Comparing yourself to others essay help
May 2, 2018
Love requires action. It's not a thing we try to get for ourselves, but instead is an action we express to others through sharing and serving.
Because love is an action, I believe there are three different forms of love God has instructed us to demonstrate, or "live out." Each one needs to be in balance so they can work together. As you read on, consider whether each one is well-balanced in your life or needs some adjustments.
#1 Loving God
Deuteronomy 6:5 says, And you shall love the Lord your God with all your [mind and] heart and with your entire being and with all your might. In the New Testament, Jesus repeats this command and even points it out as the most important commandment of all (as well as loving your neighbor as yourself).
So, how do you express love for God? By telling God, "I love You"? Singing praises to Him? These are good things, but they only scratch the surface.
We show God we love Him through obedience because actions definitely speak louder than words. I believe our level of obedience grows as we get to know and experience His love, goodness and faithfulness in our lives. Our desire to follow and obey the Lord's commandments increases as we increase our love of God.
#2 Loving Yourself
When Jesus talked about the greatest commandment of all, He quoted Deuteronomy 6:5 and said we are to love God with all our heart. But He also added the second greatest commandment: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. (See Mark 12:31.)
There's something important here that I think people often miss: You cannot give away something you don't have in you. How can someone love another person if they don't love themselves?
“You cannot give away something you don't have in you.”
We all need to accept ourselves, embrace our personalities and even our imperfections, knowing that although we are not where we need to be, we are making progress. Jesus died for us because we have weaknesses and imperfections, and we don't have to reject ourselves because of them. God wants us to love ourselves and enjoy how He's made us!
#3 Loving Others
We know that we have passed over out of death into Life by the fact that we love the brethren (our fellow Christians). He who does not love abides (remains, is held and kept continually) in [spiritual] death (1 John 3:14).
Life, in this verse, is the life of God or "life as God has it." I don't want to be one of what I call "the walking dead"─someone who lives and breathes but never truly lives as God desires.
Loving others is the only way to keep the God-kind of life flowing through you. God's love is a gift to us; it's in us, but we need to release it to others through words and actions. Left dormant, it will stagnate like a pool of water with no outlet.
The act of loving others is one of the most exhilarating things I have experienced. I feel excitement stirring in my spirit and soul when I plan to do something to make someone else feel loved and cared for.
You can experience the same exhilaration just by "loving out loud." Here's a challenge: Think of three people you know who could really use a gesture of God's love. Then think of creative ways you can express His love to these people, and do it — I guarantee you will feel a wonderful sense of fulfillment and joy afterward.
How You Can Continue to Grow in Love
If you will devote yourself to developing your love walk in these three areas, you will experience a huge amount of blessings in your life.
I encourage you to seek God about this and ask the Holy Spirit to help you grow in your love toward Jesus, yourself and others. He will help you overcome anything that might hinder you in the process. Remember, God is Love. And He loves you.
2 reasons you shouldn’t compare yourself to other people.
At what age do you stop having nightmares about college? Because I’m apparently not that age yet.
The details are always the same.
I’ve skipped class all semester but suddenly showed up for the day of the final. And it’s one of those classes where 100% of your grade is based on the final. I start to sweat and run to the administration building to drop the class, but I’ve missed the cutoff. It’s too late!
Then I wake up.
Have you ever had that particular nightmare?
The other one I sometimes have is about writing research papers. When I was in college, nobody had personal computers, instead we had personal hells called “Computer labs.”
These stress chambers were rooms, often located in windowless spaces in the library basement, that contained the most temperamental computers ever built.
You never knew if they were going to work or if the printer would jam or worst of all, if you’d actually get one when you showed up in the lab. The worst feeling was walking through that door and realizing all the computers were already taken by other people who were better prepared than you.
In those moments, it was easy to compare myself to other people. I remember constantly asking friends, “How is your paper coming? Are you done? How much do you have written?” I asked them because then I could compare my progress against theirs.
In the midst of doing that one day, my friend Jimmy told me something I’ve never forgotten. He said, “Don’t compare yourself to other people. If you’re ahead of them, you’ll get too prideful and be tempted to coast. If you’re behind them, you’ll get depressed and want to give up. Just write your own paper.”
I love that and I think he’s right.
Comparing yourself to others leads to arrogance or shame, but never happiness.
Arrogance tells you that you’re ahead. That you’re better than them. That you know something they don’t know or have accomplished something better than someone else. Pride then comes in like a wrecking ball. (Are we still doing Miley references in 2015?)
Shame tells you that you’re behind. That you’ll never catch up. That someone else has an unfair advantage and the odds are wrongfully stacked against you. That it would be a lot easier to give up.
Neither thing leads you one step closer to your goal.
Write your own book.
Start your own business.
Lose your own weight.
Walk the path that you’ve been given to walk this year.
Comparing your journey to somebody else’s is the best way to miss the one you’re actually on.
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Associate yourself with people of good quality, for it is better to be alone than in bad company. Booker T. Washington
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others to Improve Self-Esteem
Why should you stop comparing yourself to others? The main reason is that comparing yourself to others is destructive to your self-esteem. When you compare yourself to others, you might think they have it all together and believe you should be the same. You might treat life as a competition and base your worth in comparison to what other people are good at, their looks, personalities, what they have or what they’ve achieved. You may be too hard on yourself for not being like others and fail to see your own unique qualities. Comparing yourself to others is destructive to your self-esteem–and you can learn to stop it.
Basing your worth on other people is disempowering. What others do is outside of your control and you can’t change that. However, you can change the way you view yourself. Learn to stop comparing yourself to others and build your self-esteem.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
- Realise that your worth comes from inside. It’s who you are as a person regardless of externals. It does not depend on what others are doing.
- Know that looks can be deceiving. Everyone has their own issues and insecurities even though they’re often well hidden. Nobody has the perfect life. You may think someone is doing well but you don’t have the full picture.
- Stop worrying about what others are doing. You can’t control what others are doing. It’s disempowering and a waste of energy to worry about it. Instead, focus on making your own life the best it can be.
- Forget about being right or wrong. Everyone has their own unique circumstances and strengths. What’s right for one person may not be for another. Do what’s right for you at the right time for you.
- Remember that there will always be someone better than you at something. That’s life, no matter who you are. However, there are are things you’re better at, too. Realise that nobody’s good at everything. Give yourself permission to try things out and to make mistakes.
- Have realistic expectations of yourself. Let go of perfectionism and be reasonable with your expectations.
- Know your own strengths and interests. Figure out what you’re good at and what you like to do. If you’re unsure, take the time to figure it out.
- Nurture your strengths. Do the things you’re good at and enjoy.
- Focus on the positives about yourself. There are many positives about yourself and it’s a matter of seeing them. Focus on your good points. It might help to write them down or to practice gratitude.
- Embrace your individuality. Your uniqueness is what makes you special and it’s well worth embracing. You have so much value just by being yourself. Think of all the people who made a difference to this world just by being themselves.
- Know that life’s not a competition. When you stop competing with others, it’s liberating, and it gives you the freedom to be the best person you can be. Instead of competing with others, aim for personal growth.
- Find a purpose or meaning in what you do. What you’re doing matters and it’s important to realise that.
- Enjoy the journey. Don’t be overly concerned about outcomes or achievements. Instead, give yourself permission to enjoy the present moment, learn and grow.
Your life is your own unique journey and it doesn’t matter what others are doing. Be the best person you can be and embrace your individuality. Stop comparing yourself to others and give yourself permission to be yourself to improve your self-esteem.
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